The class is over.
The papers are all submitted.
Finished my position paper last night but uploaded it just now.
A nagging doubt is in the back of my mind – did I understand the task correctly? I think I did… but what if…
It has been almost 5 years since I had to write any papers for a class. However, even when I was in university (or, perhaps, even earlier), I have learned something about myself. I should not check my work too vigorously because usually the first time I’ve done the tasks was the correct way to do them. Almost every single time when I would change something in my answers due to doubts, the corrected answer would be wrong and my initial answer would be correct.
Another talon scratching at my heart is – what will my grade be?
I have never been a 4.0 student before. However, I have checked the classes I’ve taken for this college and found out (much to my surprise, since I haven’t really been checking my grades in so long) that my GPA is 4.0. It scares me. It scares me because it makes me conscious that I might not be perfect and I want to be…
In university, I was happy if I was getting 91% on a paper or exam. Right now? I’ve got 94% for one of the tasks and wondered what I did wrong. It’s not right… Since when have I stopped enjoying studying for the sake of studying? My mom never pushed me to be a straight-A student. I knew she was proud of me when I got good grades, but I also knew that she would be proud of me even if I got a C – just because I knew she loves me no matter what my grades are.
So I worry about my grade… and I wonder, at the same time, why on earth do I worry?
That said… I am glad I have taken this class.
It has been a challenge because it made me think.
What is the Church?
What is the mission of the Church? Is there a reason God placed His Church in the middle of this sinful world?
What are our, as followers of Christ, tasks?
What do I do now that I know what my mission is?
It has been one of the most hands-on class I’ve taken so far.
It wasn’t just theology, rather it was theology in action.
Not simply learning about the history of the church but rather applying the lessons from the history.
Now the only thing that remains to do is to actually start implementing the knowledge in everyday life.
It’s not easy. It requires me to be more extraverted that I’d like to be and than I am.
At the same time, I know the results will be well worth the price.
So be it.
P.S. I highly recommend C. Wright’s book called The Mission of God’s People. I have enjoyed reading it (even though it was an assigned textbook and I don’t usually like to read assigned books) because it is well-structured and there is a lot of good solid practical teachings and thoughts in it.