[correct answers phobia]
I have mentioned it briefly a couple of times at my blog, but today it’s all I keep thinking about.
I have an allergy for “right answers” and what’s worse – I am afraid of them.
This might seem weird to some, but hear me out…
In youth group (and earlier too but not as much) I often heard something along the lines “Don’t tell me the ‘right answer’ but tell me what you think about this or that issue.”
Most of the time, I had to remain quiet because what I thought coincided with the “right answer” – and I didn’t want to stand out as Ms. Smartie Pants (the trick didn’t really work since I was already known as someone who knows a lot). As a result, while I sat and listened to what others had to say regarding some issue, I wondered… If my view coincides with the “right answer” then obviously there should be some other answer which would be more accepted, more “right” if I may.
I know it might sound silly. However, these days I feel as if that is one of the biggest obstacles in my life when it comes to sharing Good News. I hate giving the “right answers” (even when they are truly right) just because… well, I was taught to tell what I think and not the “right answer.”
When someone asks a question… I halt. I double- and triple-check myself. I doubt myself that I know the answer… Even when I do.
Most of the time, my “trained” logic tells me this: “If this is too obvious, then it’s obviously wrong.” (This got me in trouble quite often at school and university – one of the reasons why I stopped checking my work before taking it to the teacher. Whenever I would think I answered the question wrong and changed the answer… the correction was wrong and the initial answer was correct.) So when I am tackled with questions of faith, some things are obvious after so many years of hearing about them, and you begin to wonder… are they right?