I was planning on writing another post, yet when I started writing that one, I’ve felt like God was telling me, “Hey, that’s not what I wanted you to write about. I wanted you to write about that other subject you and I discussed.”
*SIGH* Arguing with Him is a rather dumb endeavour (even though I still try sometimes).
This morning I got ready for work and checked my e-mail to see what I’ve got. Among other random e-mails, there was my daily GodSpeaks Devotional. Most of the days I read it when I am already at work, but I had time so I sat down with my iPod to read.
Then Peter came to Him and said, ‘Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?’
Matthew 18:21, NKJV
Immediately I thought about the events last week.
“Did you forgive her like I forgave you?” He asked.
“Umm…” I stalled knowing perfectly well that He knows the answer to His own question.
“I forgave you for a lot, you know.”
“So, what if she hurts my friends again?”
“Read the story again.”
*HUMPF* If He wants to make a point, He will make a point.
It has been incredibly quiet at work this week. The gal who drove me nuts and was the reason of my frustration is… nice and friendly. I have shared with my pastor on Monday that it makes me even more tense – I am afraid that once I will relax, she will start all over again (it did happen in the past). But for now, I cannot say anything else besides “Praise God” because all the prayers have been answered.
Am I happy? It’s certainly nice to work as a team but I guess I am still holding a grudge (otherwise He would not be trying so hard to make a point). I can’t help but remember that she has hurt my friends. Yet, He forgave me for hurting Him and His friends.
God, please help me let this go. Maybe it would be labelled as naive in our modern society, but I still want to believe that in every single person there is goodness inside. You said when You have created the man that he was very good. The goodness has been tarnished by the Fall, yet I know that a piece of You resides within every single person’s soul. It is there in me, it is there in Ilona. Thank You for using this experience to teach me about forgiveness and teamwork. You rule. Amen.