[random notes: the other side]

[random notes: the other side]

(SIDENOTE: These are just random thoughts. I am not thinking about dying any time soon – well, unless it happens.)

Our new office building is located right next to a cemetery. This has been an item for jokes for quite some time before we moved in last December, but we sort of adjusted to that by now. Our windows face the other direction, so we get a gorgeous view of Kyiv instead of the cemetery. However, there is a balcony on our 15th floor and it does face the cemetery.

My friend from work and I sometimes go outside to the balcony to get some fresh air and to chat outside of office (we have open-space office… and it’s REALLY open-space with only 1ft dividers between tables). I realized that I don’t mind gazing at the cemetery. They look peaceful – no surprise the most popular quote there is “Rest in peace”… It almost sounds attractive.

I’m torn between two desires: I long to go and be with Christ, which would be far better for me. But for your sakes, it is better that I continue to live.

Philippians 1:23, NLT

I haven’t been to one in about 6 or 7 years because I didn’t want to go alone (our cemeteries over here are quite gothic and not safe), but I also did not want to go with any of my family members because my perception of death is slightly different and I don’t really get their’s.

Some may say that I am just young and don’t understand anything and that I probably think that I will never die. Wrong, at least on one count: I know perfectly well that I am going to die sometime because of something. That’s life… err… I mean… You know what I mean. I would disagree with “You don’t understand anything” too, because I have lost people who were close to me. However, all whom I’ve lost were followers of Jesus, so I am not worried about that part. Maybe I am young – won’t argue there – I am.

Some look at me as if I grew a second nose right there on my forehead when I tell them that “Well, we’re all gonna die one day.” I don’t say it in a morbid kind of way, just matter-of-factly. They say I am too young to think about dying. They say that I still have time. I usually shrug and retreat back into my thoughts. Only God knows how much time we have. By worrying about when our time will come we won’t improve the quality of our lives, so why worry?

The only reason (besides the fact that I know that my future is secure) why I think I am not too worried for now is because I do not have a family of my own. I am not worried about leaving my husband / kids behind.

But yeah… those were my random thoughts.

  • mm hmmmmmm… i hear ya.

    welcome to the Odd Club, Herb 😀

  • We lived in a parsonage that the back yard bordered a cemetery. It was very relaxing to me to walk around and look at the tombstones and imagine the story behind a particular grave or epitaph. Death is just a part of life. I think you've got a good perspective, second nose or not. 😉
    My recent post Are You Growing

  • Krissy Buck

    I used to be scared of flying but one day I reminded myself I have no control over when I'm going to die. So I got over it. Simple. But, now that I know God, I almost can't wait. I mean, when I think about being with him for eternity….I feel at peace. But, then, I feel differently when I look at my children. The time will come and when it does, it will be an awesome day.

    • ah, i looooooove flying… either in a plane or in my dreams – oh, those dreams are absolute best. i guess i just love heights and that's what flying's all about – you can't really fly at an altitude of 3 feet (that would be hovering, i guess) 😀

      it surely will be an awesome day… at least for us.
      My recent post random notes- the other side

  • Jonathan

    I once had a talk with my dad about this. We were on a fishing trip in Canada, and he was warning me about the bears. (He knew that I have this propensity to wander off and he wanted me to be safe.) When he asked me what I would do if a bear came after me I said that I would tell it to stop. I won't die until God assents to it, so why should I be worried about what might happen. My days are numbered. My dad still thought I was nuts.

    p.s. My last blog entry is "Fire Drills" at <a href="http://www.jonathanukraineministry.webs.com” target=”_blank”>www.jonathanukraineministry.webs.com

    • well… that is true that until God assents to it, we don't have to worry… but that still doesn't mean we should willingly walk toward the obvious threat for our lives (unless there's a bigger purpose to that). telling the bear to stop would be something sort of a suicide… and we do have the choice to commit suicide. that would be a dumb thing to do, yet we technically can do it.

      (btw, the comment luv would work for your blog too 🙂 you just need to insert "http://jonathanukraineministry.webs.com/apps/blog/&quot; into the site url 😉 )
      My recent post random notes- the other side

      • Jonathan

        Even if we choose suicide, we will fail if God sets Himself against it. That was not my point. God can make the bear understand when I say "stop." It was not that I was searching out the bear, the hypothetical situation was about an accidental encounter. That said, the whole reason I wander off is so that I can go be alone with God. I think He'll watch over me. And I'm ok with it if I still die.

        (I must not have put in the whole URL earlier…)

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