[separation pain wave]

[separation pain wave]

It has been almost a week since I’ve said good bye to my team.

I want my boys back!

The wave of nostalgia tsunami-ed over me just now. Dang, it hurts. Partly it’s because mom’s gone for the day and I am home alone with my thoughts. Partly it’s due to all the blog posts about families that have been circulating in the blogosphere this week. (Gotta clarify: I loved those posts and I am glad that there are families like that, yet since I don’t have my own kids yet, I feel like I am missing out.)

I… I am not sure what to say even. I just really really miss my Phoenix team – with their yelling matches and fighting; with their sweet moments and moments when the questions they asked made even my pastor roll his eyes; the moments when I cheered on top of my lungs when they were playing soccer (I did not know I could yell like that before) and the moments when they cheered for me when I played soccer (I knew it would bring pleasure to them to see me play since I was their counselor, albeit a girl… I know it’s not as extravagant as Dusty allowing his little Anne apply lipstick to his lips or other stunts, but for me, who swore not to play soccer ever again, it was a stunt too)…

I don’t think I ever felt being more of a mother rather than just a counselor to the kids in the camp. I guess I did grow up since last year. The boys also helped me fit into that role easier because after three or so days they considered me their mother (I don’t think they would decide to change their clothes right in front of me if they would think of me as a girl counselor… Another side note: I did leave the room right away when I saw ’em changing…)

I walked past a kids’ playground today on my way home from work and there were lots of kids there. I couldn’t help but think “Whose team are these kids from? Where the heck is their counselor?”



  • Zee that is too sweet.

    Maybe God is nudging you 🙂
    My recent post Phobia Of Public Restrooms

    • nudging me toward what, Mike?

  • Thanks for the mention..I think! (What in the world was I thinking when I hit post this morning!) LOL.

    Kids of any age have a way of endearing themselves to your heart. In God's time and will, may you experience the joys of parenthood for yourself.
    My recent post Parent &amp Child

    • yeah… i so long for that day when i will be able to enjoy being a parent…

  • I know the feeling–I miss my KCA kids! When I was student teaching, I never really felt a sense of "ownership" over my classroom. But now, having taught for a year, those KCA kiddos are MINE. I miss 'em and can't wait to see most of them again in a few weeks!
    My recent post Summer Update

    • (singing) soon and very soon you will see your kids again, la la la la 🙂

      i cannot even imagine what it's like when you spend a year with the same kiddos…

  • That's what kids are supposed to do to you – when you invest in them they become part of you 🙂 Good job, Zee.
    My recent post holdmeback

    • they are certainly a good investment – the joy-of-watching-them-grow-and-mature dividends are well worth it.

  • Zee, although I have my own kids, I can relate to this. Last year I helped every week in the preschool class at church. The last day was just a few days after I found my mom and saying goodbye to another thing was kind of hard. It didn't compare to losing my mom, but it was another thing I had to say goodbye too. One kid moved to New Hampshire and I'll never see her again. Others just went on to separate things. I will miss them. It's hard for sure. So (((HUGS))) to you. It's ok to be sad.
    My recent post Sleeping through a tornado

    • thanks Michelle. (((HUGS))) back to you too.

%d bloggers like this: